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”“Kara told me about the movie you guys made. And I know about the one Abbie wants to make for which she wrote the screenplay. How did it feel watching yourself? And would you make the one Abbie wrote?”“It was strange,” I said. “Not bad, just a bit weird. As for making Abbie’s movie, the fantasy is nice, but there is no way we could release it. And I highly doubt we’d get a dozen real virgins to allow their first time to be filmed! Not to mention how that entire thing might make Samantha feel after what her dad did.”“I hadn’t thought about that. The women who act in those movies? Do they do it because they want to or because they have to?”“I’m sure it’s a mix of both. It’s like prostitution, I guess. There are some women who do it because they want to, others are forced into it. And you have to carefully think about how free they really are. Some people would argue that it’s not voluntary if it’s out of dire economic necessity. And you and I have had this discussion, though not in. In the past such ravenous behavior would cause me to panic. Men closing in from all sides would incite a hyperventilating surreal separation of mind and body. Now I encourage it, now I walk naked into the wolves den. But no matter how many parties I attend or theaters I visit, that nervous anxiety one feels before the big game never dissipates. I gave up, long ago, trying to get the butterflies to leave, now I just try to get them to fly in formation.The lobby was small and sparse, a few metal chairs and round bar tables. One guy, big heavy man was expecting me, think his name was Brent. Many theaters have methods of alerting their regulars. Like shooting up a red flare, their internet flags go out like indian smoke signals. “Brent’s theater tails,” I think that was what he called his media posts. We exchanged “hellos,” he was there for the play by play commentary not the blow jobs.I had to relieve my bladder and check my makeup. The bathroom was exactly as expected, dirty, old tile.
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